I Am Shocked--SHOCKED!!--to Find a 70-Year-Old, Millionaire Viagra Addict Paying Young Women to Have Sex with Him. Shocked. I Am

The New York Post reports that professional poker player Jill Ann Spaulding claims in a self-published book that the Playboy caliph keeps a dozen "slave bunnies" who are ordered to have sex with him (for $2,000 a week).

$2,000 a week? Man, slavery sure has changed over the years.

And am I crazy or is the fight for reparations starting to sound like a good idea?