Why Are You Looking at Me like That? It Could Happen

Santa Barbara County sheriff's deputies come across a bizarre encounter at La Purisima Mission in Lompoc.

Around midnight they found a 69-year-old Huntington beach man naked and covered in oats.

Deputies say the man had covered himself in olive oil, rolled around in oats and allowed the horses at the mission to lick him clean.

He apparently told deputies this has always been a fantasy of his and drove up from the Los Angeles area to play it out.

I hope they're not too hard on the guy. I mean, substitute melted chocolate for olive oil, Ecstasy and Skittles for oats, and Monica Bellucci (pictured), Salma Hayek, Pam Greer, Catherine Bell, Nigella Lawson, and a few of their girlfriends for horses, and who hasn't had that fantasy? I know I have, and if I ever have a chance to play it out, I hope the public is understanding in its judgment.