Is It Pizza Pthursday, Yet?

Herman Cain’s Campaign Promises with Mike Tyson from Mike Tyson

“Hello, I'm Herman Cain…. I use to be the CEO of Godfather's, a restaurant so gross, it made my children hate pizza. Now, I'm running for president, and leading in the Republican polls.

“Why? Because the Tea Party loves Crazy more than it hates blacks, and I'm crazier than a shit house rat.”

I worked for Godfather's Pizza back in the '80s, so, technically, I worked for Herman Cain once upon a time, and, yes, he harassed me while I was on the job—if we agree that by “harassed” we mean “paid me minimum wage and made me wear a hair net.” I've barely been gainfully employed since.