I Can't Tell You How Sorry I Am about This

My friend The Law Guy, over at I Respectfully Dissent, use to amuse me with the reported Google searches that brought visitors to his site--inquiries so ridiculously off-topic for a blog devoted to the law, matters related to its practice, and his experience as a defense attorney that if I didn't know better, I'd say he was making them all up. Now, I'm a believer, because, today, I was notified that Google directed someone to my blog after typing "anusitis" into his search bar.

And I couldn't be sorrier about that. Someone with an inflamed anus turned to Google for knowledge and, possibly, relief, and all he got was me. That's sad, bordering on tragic. What he did in a previous life to deserve this is beyond my imagination, but it must have been awful, for which this is, then, well deserved. Still, my conscience won't let me shrug it off, my part in his karmic retribution being more than I'm comfortable with. So, whoever you are, "Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry," ad infinitum.

Keep trying. I'm sure knowledge and relief are just one more mouse click away. Godspeed.

And if I may make a suggestion, I'm not so sure "My anus is inflamed to the point of concern. I think I'll seek help on Google" should be your thought process. Your thought process should be along these lines: "Painful. Swollen. Orifice. Must. Seek. Medical. Care." Please do.

And, again, Godspeed.