I Don't Know: Some Guys -- and Mind You I Know Them -- Find a Woman with a Fu Manchu Sexy.

Defense witnesses in the Michael Jackson child molesting trial on Monday appeared to contradict testimony by the accuser's mother that she sought to escape from Neverland Ranch, saying she instead had an extensive body wax ... at Mr. Jackson's expense....

A Neverland employee, Kathryn Bernard, testified that the mother insisted on making that appointment immediately, and Ms. Bernard said she drove her there within the hour."

I can just imagine the call -- "I'm fine now, but if someone doesn't start depilating me, and I mean soon, I'm a Chia Pet by noon. Code Blue! Repeat: CODE BLUE!" -- because, trust me, I've been there, girlfriend.