I Thought the Fun of Joining the Mile High Club Was in the Naughty, Forbidden Part, Not the Sex

Those in Atlanta seeking to join the 'Mile High Club' by having sex in an airborne aircraft can now do it for $299, but partners are not provided.

Corporate pilot Bob Smith, says he and his business partner conceived the idea for a flying love nest five years ago as a weekend income supplement. . . .

Smith said couples get a custom-fit bed, brand new sheets and a complimentary bottle of Champagne, and he pulls privacy curtains and dons headphones as a courtesy.

I would've been all right if he hadn't mentioned that they provide you with brand new sheets, because I just assumed they would. As they felt a need to mention it, I now have a great, big case of the Creeping Funkies because mentioning the new sheets implies new sheets are a courtesy others don't (or wouldn't) provide, and the thought of having sex on a jizz-encrusted spunk mat -- YEE-AUGH! -- makes my skin crawl. I don't care what the thread count is.

But that's just me. I'm sensitive.