First Name Rhymes with Shaky. Last Name Rhymes with Worm
Today, a good friend of mine turned embarrassingly older than I am. Oh, don't get me wrong. She's embarrassingly older than I am throughout the year. It's just that this is the day we celebrate that incontrovertible fact.
Having known her for over twenty years, I can safely say that sending her the above card would be wildly inappropriate. So I'm just going to post it.
Happy birthday, unnamed friend!
posted by Biff Loman at 6:16 PM
2 Comments:
Biff, there CAN'T be people older than you.
It's hard to believe, I know, but it is true. I keep their names written down on this list.
For instance, there's one woman in northern Virginia—who we'll just refer to as Duffy—who is two years older than I am, but looks like she's lapped me twice on the life clock (because she didn't moisturize properly when we were in college).
And there really is an un-named woman who's exactly three months to the day older than I am. She doesn't always look it, but, occasionally, when her colorist is having a bad week, you can tell. Oh, you can tell.
I'd better get back to my restoration bath. Orphans tears—although plentiful (thank you President Bush)—are only good when they are fresh.
Post a Comment
<< Home