That's a No on the Kindle; Yes on the Target Gift Card

When I think of Mother's Day, I think of daffodils, bright, spring days, and the sacrifice, love, and support given to me by the woman who birthed me, who's probably somewhere rubbing one out to a poorly written sex scene in 50 Shades of Gray.

For pointing that out to me, I say, “Thanks a lot, SNL.”