Am I the Only One Curious about the Identity of the Person Who Called in the Suicide? By Curious, I Mean, I'm Looking at You, Mrs. Kravitz

Linda Kay is an exotic dancer who performs at a nude juice bar in Union, N.J. . . .

When Kay isn't on stage, she may be at her home on Diana Drive in South Plainfield, enjoying her unusual art collection.

On a dresser in her basement bedroom, she had a human hand in a Mason jar filled with formaldehyde. She calls it 'Freddie,' a friend told the Newark Star-Ledger. Upstairs in a bedroom were six human skulls.

Kay's collection went largely unnoticed until Friday, when police went to her home to investigate a report of someone attempting suicide.

They found no suicide victim, . . .

People who worked with or otherwise knew Kay came to her defense.

Montclair attorney Ira Weiner, who represents Hott 22 in Union, where Kay works, said she is a "lovely girl" and has "never been violent towards anybody. I'd be surprised if she had any violence in her.

"And Hott 22 does not knowingly hire mass murderers."

. . .Patricia Ann Kay said her daughter had been drawn toward the morbid since she was a girl. She collected animal skulls, including a Texas longhorn.

"She would find snake skeletons in our back yard," Patricia Ann Kay said. "That was just her. It's a fascination with the human body."

She said she knew Linda was an exotic dancer, but had never watched her perform.

"She has a flair for the dramatic," Patricia Ann said. "I have never tried to stop my children from doing whatever they want. As long as they are happy, aren't hurting anyone and it's keeping them out of the poorhouse."

Your mom and your lawyer, the two people you can depend on for a reasonable defense of just about anything you do. You might want to remember that the next time you wake to find a human head in your freezer with no idea that you can offer to yourself or the police for how it got there.

But, seriously, call your lawyer first.