Worth Visiting Just to Hear the Use of the Phrase "Butt Pudding"

Forgo eye contact as this may lead to a severe beating or an unwelcome sexual encounter. . . .

Speech is your enemy. Never, ever, under any circumstance say a single word while in a bathroom, not to a friend, not to a lover, not even to Jesus, himself. Violation of this precept grates against all good things and the ways of nature, corrodes the efficiency of the bathroom, and places the very fabric of our civilization in peril.

Amen. I'm sorry we need tutorials like this.