I Like the Way the Washington Post Tried to Find an Unattractive Picture of Her. I, on the Other Hand, Didn't Even Make an Effort. For Shame, Me

Early this month, 18-year-old Allison Stokke walked into her high school track coach's office and asked if he knew any reliable media consultants….

In her high school track and field career, Stokke had won a 2004 California state pole vaulting title, broken five national records and earned a scholarship to the University of California, yet only track devotees had noticed. … A former gymnast, Stokke had tried pole vaulting as a lark as a freshman in high school. Two months later, she set a school record. She won the 2004 state championship three months after that. Stokke had augmented her natural, pole-vaulting disposition -- speed, upper-body strength and courage -- by lifting weights three times each week. College programs including Harvard, Stanford and UCLA also recruited her.

Intelligent, talented, and smoking hot: People think it's an easy life. At our secret meetings, where we discuss world philosophies and compare the magnitudes of our hotness, we call those people "Fatties." And we laugh at their ordinariness. Oh, how we laugh.