“I'd Like a Perv Latte, Please.” Damn: They Never Get My Order Right

A man dressed in woman’s underwear and exposing himself drove up to a Parkland espresso stand three times before one of the baristas threw a cup of boiling water at him, said the Pierce County Sheriff’s Office.

Jamae Feddock, a bikini clad barista at Java Girls, said she first thought the man dressed in women’s underwear and exposing himself was a sick joke, until the man came back several times. The first time, though, she thought it was funny.

Then he came back a second time.

“He has underwear over his face, he's wearing hot pink panties now and the underwear that he was wearing is over his face and there's a little peephole so he can see, because, you know, safety first.” Feddock said.

Feddock and another barista were working around 5 a.m. last Thursday when the incident happened. They tried to get a look at the man’s license plate, but that too was covered up with women’s underwear (no peephole).

When the man came back a third time one of the baristas took a cup of scolding hot water and doused him with it.

“Kylie opened the door and threw boiling hot water on his face and his chest and he said, ‘Ooooh yeah,’” Feddock said.


Of course, he did. This is Washington state. Had she thrown an espresso shot on him, he would have shot his load—which would have provided them with some DNA evidence.

Live and learn, ladies. Live and learn.